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Wednesday, 23 January 2013

Suicidal Note

Suicidal Note




by Olivia Meyers






Deep down inside 
lay feelings that can't rewind 
emotions dug in deep, emotions undescribed 
feelings that simply cannot be defined 
  
The search for a friend 
to try and help the pain end 
always leads to another hurt 
when they too desert 
  
Hurtful words that leave me feeling worthless 
they lead me to believe that I have no purpose 
  
Thinking they conceive me to be wasted time 
like I to them am useless 
like existing is a crime 
  
Sacrificing anything to try and keep them pleased 
even when they continue to treat me like I'm diseased 
I feel as nothing's ever good enough 
even though a few tell me I'm just a 'diamond in the rough' 
  
You can clearly see what you're doing 
there is nothing but numbness left within  
when everything's so confusing 
it becomes difficult to distinguish the dead from the living 


Left alone for days crying 
but you don't care 
and I'm done trying 
pain is something I can no longer bear 
  
What good is life when you're locked inside yourself 
and can't find your way out 
feeling as though you cry out to no one 
drifting around an empty cell 


I've screamed, I've pleaded 
sat on a window ledge 
no one seems to bother 
would this be considered a form of murder? 
  
I feel my soul tearing apart 
from this despairing heart 
but you don't care to listen 
so now my blood must glisten 
  
I'm convinced of only one answer 
I can give up and fall  
or continue to act as though it's all fine 
but trying to feel something by banging your head against the wall 
is no way to stumble on living 
  
You cannot judge me 
you don't live with the nightmares that haunt me 
I sit in the dark without a light 
but I'm afraid that my tears might turn into rage 
  
I'm headed towards the bottom 
with a permanent solution to a temporary problem 
  
Tell me what you thought 
as you helped me tie that knot 
This is the demolition of my life 
as you help me to sharpen the knife 
  
  
Now it's done 
now I'm gone 
  
Yours truly, 
The Corpse





***The End***

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